Bi-Sexual Vortex
I really dunno whether to think of it as a compliment or as an insult, but I am officially labeled a giant bi-sexual vortex... not that I am genuinely bi-sexual or anything, but it is due to the constant attraction I draw from both sexes...
Being hit on by women is flattering of cos... even more so when the lady is very attractive herself... but of 100% of the time I get hit on, 55% of the time comes from men... erm.. make that gays.... bleah...
At a corporate event, in the space of 2 mins... I get hit on by a caucasian man who happens to be a long-time friend of the chairman of my company... imagine the political landmine exploding in my face if I did not handle it correctly... not I do not swing both ways... and I shudder at that very thought... so every physical advance done by the ang-moh is strategically countered by the ever alert gay phobic ME!
After what seemed like ages of being on my guard, I decided I earned myself a breather from all the stiffs in the room and excused myself for the boys room... on my way, I see my favourite person to banter... April... and I politely informed her that in the event that the gay decides to feel my up, I would slap that bitchslap that asshole back to his country (and I'm kinda guessing that he'd like that wouldn't he?? hahaha)
Anyway, after letting some steam of my chest, April and I were exhanging comments on the event when one of her friends stepped over towards us and started talking to her... within 15 secs, I excused myself from the threesome (nothing ever comes out right anymore... without it being sexually suggestive) and made my way back to my table...
April informs me a few days later that her friend who walked over towards us during the corporate event, who is a strategic partner of our company, had his eye on me... simply fantastic... I am really a fucking gay magnet!
Maybe its my butt... I have had so many comments on my butt from men, women, and... gays that I have decided to insure my tight ass (comment from a certain someone) for a large sum of money... I must admit... that from time to time, I do enjoy having my ass grabbed by my partner when we are in the midst of... ahem...
Men have looked at it, women have secretly glanced at it, gays secretly wish that they can have it, and my friends openly talk and discuss about it... it is beginning to dawn on me that my butt is the source of my mojo, my bisexual vortex vibe...
Being hit on by women is flattering of cos... even more so when the lady is very attractive herself... but of 100% of the time I get hit on, 55% of the time comes from men... erm.. make that gays.... bleah...
At a corporate event, in the space of 2 mins... I get hit on by a caucasian man who happens to be a long-time friend of the chairman of my company... imagine the political landmine exploding in my face if I did not handle it correctly... not I do not swing both ways... and I shudder at that very thought... so every physical advance done by the ang-moh is strategically countered by the ever alert gay phobic ME!
After what seemed like ages of being on my guard, I decided I earned myself a breather from all the stiffs in the room and excused myself for the boys room... on my way, I see my favourite person to banter... April... and I politely informed her that in the event that the gay decides to feel my up, I would slap that bitchslap that asshole back to his country (and I'm kinda guessing that he'd like that wouldn't he?? hahaha)
Anyway, after letting some steam of my chest, April and I were exhanging comments on the event when one of her friends stepped over towards us and started talking to her... within 15 secs, I excused myself from the threesome (nothing ever comes out right anymore... without it being sexually suggestive) and made my way back to my table...
April informs me a few days later that her friend who walked over towards us during the corporate event, who is a strategic partner of our company, had his eye on me... simply fantastic... I am really a fucking gay magnet!
Maybe its my butt... I have had so many comments on my butt from men, women, and... gays that I have decided to insure my tight ass (comment from a certain someone) for a large sum of money... I must admit... that from time to time, I do enjoy having my ass grabbed by my partner when we are in the midst of... ahem...
Men have looked at it, women have secretly glanced at it, gays secretly wish that they can have it, and my friends openly talk and discuss about it... it is beginning to dawn on me that my butt is the source of my mojo, my bisexual vortex vibe...
posted by homme_dec at 12:07 PM
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